I belong to a tribe of moms who are a combination of working and stay-at-home mom. I juggle at home with work from home assignments, my blogs, and daily household chores. In initial days when I left my job, there was this constant war in my head which kept going on and kept me awake at nights whether the decision of leaving my job was right or not. My dream of making a mark in the corporate world, to be the best in my field haunted me at night and shattered into million pieces.
Pregnancy hormones made this worse and I started to feel the least of all around me. One fine day, I woke up and felt empty inside. I cried my heart out and decided to talk it out to someone who would understand it or rather just listen to me.
I could not think of anyone better than the man who has known me for more than a decade and still standing strong with me.
*Man of the House* *whipping the chocolate in mug*
I am here, whenever you decide to talk about it. A hot chocolate might help.
I miss my identity…
*Man of the house**Never saw him talking this philosophically*
If you think your job was your identity then you are highly mistaken my love. You miss the daily adrenaline rush and excitement of work.
*Me* *silently sobbing*
I don’t know… may be…
*Man of the House**turns towards me*
Sweetheart, I might not be able to understand fully what a women’s body goes through during pregnancy or delivery, but I know YOU and your Strength. The only person who could pull you out from this feeling of “good for nothing” is YOU.
We sat for the entire night and yes, I did finish that hot chocolate milk. After our night session of talking endlessly, I (with the help of my loved ones) decided to be my own guide and took myself out of that depressing zone. The constant war has been replaced by happiness and pieces of my dream are now being used to build another fortress of the dream of mine.
I enjoy the adrenaline rush, the high, constant hymn inside you when you enjoy your work and fight each day to prove yourself, call it whatever you want, every day now.
**Being a mom is the best phase of my life and it keeps getting better with each day.**
You can read my previous blog in the series here.